Fantasy vs Reality

sometimes i just wish i could stop time, make everything stay still for just that particular moment... but there are also times when i just wish that time would just pass us by with a blink of an eye...

just finished filling up the pilot application tis afternoon... wont submit it yet cus i still dont haf a recent photo of myself... gonna take photo 2molo n make copies of my documents... ytd at the gathering rudy told me his frenz oso applying 4 pilot, which was sometime ago already... he did told me b4, saying his frenz gotta retake his o-levels cus they require us to pass english i one sitting... but i pass mine as a private candidate...

when i heard tis last time... i gave up on tinking abt applying for pilot, but when i went online n saw the application, it stated o-levels OR diploma... so i thgt i got a diploma which would be enough rite... so decided to apply for it anyway... maybe can wait n see if it really require to pass english n other subjects in one sitting...

would oso start to send in resumes for other jobs... hehe might even try for police :P then really gotta try pass IPPT liaoz haha... hai~

life is so full of shit... had a tok wif ma ytd, b4 going out 4 the gathering... we tok abt our family's current income n expenditures... it is then when i realised tat our family really running low on $$... ma only get abt $600 every month from her part time job... then pa only abt $100 every week, somemore it's a full time job...

but worst is... cus pa is still under bankruptcy... so every month we gotta pay $200 to the OA, then there's the electric/water bill abt $170 every month, house loan $400, added up already abt $800 already... lucky sis still got give $$ to them every month if not dont know how we gonna pay for all these... then plus i got my own bills abt $200 every month... so total we gotta pay abt $1K for all kinds of bills...

so i was toking to ma abt how i gonna settle all these $ wif my future job... really gotta find a job tat could let me take home at least $1500... then i told her i would keep $500, n the $1K i would use to pay all those bills... n the money they earned themselves... they could keep it or use it for themselves...

tink tis is the only way out for now... $500 every month should be enough for me... just gotta stop going out... hehe anyway i dont really go out :P... well, the best solution is the cadet pilot application... if tis goes well then it would be the best tingy tat happen in my life... hehe if not... then it sucks... hahaha :P

actually i was tinking i'm kinda lucky not to be in a relationship or anytingy... cus it would make the money matters worst...