Be Optimistc? Can i ever achieve that?

Went to work part time for NTUC ytd nite, as a guard to look after the chinese new year goods... was actually happy at 1st when i know i'll be getting quite some $$ from doing this job... eventhough i would only get the pay like near end of FEB... but i'm still happy... till it strucked me... i only haf $51 in my bank, $120 on hand, which makes a total of only $171... till end of FEB!!! for any person that amount would be more than enough to survive a month or even more... or is it?

Estimated amount of money required for bills from 15 JAN till end of FEB:
*insurance (jan) = $34
*starhub mobile (jan) = $2 (due to reward points)

*starhub scv/maxonline (feb) = $120
*singtel home tel. line (feb) = $32
*insurance (feb) = $34
*starhub mobile = $26

So, i'm having a shortage of abt $167...(including my weekly spendings of $15, for 6weeks)... now all i could do is try to delay paying my feb bills will i get the ntuc pay... just hope it would arrive before end of feb... if not i going to be in deep shit...

How could u wan a guy to be more optimistic when everytime i try to get back up, i got pushed down again... where is tat pat on the shoulder when i needed the most? saying everything would be alrite... dont worry, things would work out just fine... try not to stress out too much on it... hai~

Wat did i do to deserve all these miseries?...