was looking at other blogs when i saw tis petition to impost a harsher sentence on the cat killer in singapore... http://www.petitiononline.com/killer75/petition.html do go to the link to sign the petition if u love cats, n hope tat these kind of ppl get what they deserve after torturing animals... mine is at signature 4360 :P

"If you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you, be gentle on yourself. There's nothing wrong with you. Love just didn't choose to rest in the other person's heart..."

when i saw tis, i felt like laughing and crying at the same time... wanna laugh cus to me tis phrase came too late... felt so much like crying as love NEVER chooses to rest in anyone's heart, for my case...

who could be gentle to oneself after a rejection? if u r handsome, maybe... if u r rich, maybe... not me...

i had tis thought some days back... if given a chance to go back in time to change my life... maybe i shouldn't haf let anyone know tat i had feelings for HER... then maybe, just maybe tingys wrong get out of hand till the state i'm in rite now... or i should've just given up back then... n go for the other one... well, all i can say is timing was all wrong... cus only during chem lessons then i start noticing her...

anyway... all these days i kept on tinking until sometimes it hurts in the heart... already 24... n not even once a relationship... i going into a state of blocking n refusing to love... i cant find any ways to stop it... cus everytingy, everyone around me is forcing me into tat state of mind...

so sick of life~

the weather is so nice tis weekend... so cloudy n windy... abit of rain... but ytd sky was so dark near the evening tat i cant go down to play bball... so thgt of going down tis morning... but over slept till 10am... but the weather still beri nice... no sunshine at all, n it's not even gonna rain... but now got nice shows on the tv... so was tinking maybe after the shows then go down play... but hope later the weather still so nice... just dont suddenly rain can liaoz lol...

n finally... 3 more days till the IMF tingy end... n 5 more days till the start of my leave, n the start of my home's renovation... so fast finally can get a rest from all those heavy carrying on my shoulders...

today is just a "GREAT" day... another reason for me to add on to y i'm not going to stay on my current job for more than a year...

after lunch, got 2 calls stating tat i gotta go do a pre-FSMA check on 2 machines in FXAP, just above my office... this is like a thorough check on the machines to make sure tat they're in gd condition n suitable to sign new contracts for them... actually it should be simple, but...

the 1st 1 was ok... just abit of alignment problem, but still in gd condition... then i went to the 2nd machine, 1st tingy i realised was the menu screen was not responding, the machine hanged... cus the printer had an error, stating to reboot the printer... so i did... off n on the machine, but the error was still there...

remembering i got a similar case back then, i removed the harddisk of the printer n it worked... so the harddisk is spoilt, n i changed it... but just as i was abt to go off, i was asked to teach them how to operate the machine... which was alrite, cus as a CUSTOMER SERVICE engineer, we gotta do tat... so i taught them how to remove jam if one should occur, how to set up the mail box for scanning documents, then... one of them tried to print using postscript, instead of the traditional method of normal printing... tat causes the machine to hang again... why? cus the postscript driver wasnt installed at all... so i tell them i'm not beri gd in software n wanted to get a software engineer for them, then they questioned how come i cant do it... well, tis i didn't tell them in the face is tat, their pc is connected to the machine through a server, which i have no access to... n i cant download or install anytingy on their pc individually cus it wont do any gd... why i didn't tell them tis? cause i know it would just make them more frustrated n they may tink i'm trying to push the blame of the machine not working properly...

so i gotta call my manager n he came up to have a look... n he confirmed with them tat the postscript driver was not installed for the new machine, n have to get another department to do it... n the machine was working properly, just tat the driver wasnt installed... for tis i call i stood there n fix tis problem for like 3hrs... i was even at a lost of words when trying to explain to them... tats y i hate working in an office environment... i rather be working in a warehouse carrying goods, dont have to face those ppl in offices...

fucking sian man... too bad i still doesn't have enough income yet... if not i would've quit... gotta try save up as much as i can before march next yr... cause i'll be quitting then...

so sian... but finally coming to the end of the week... can go play bball try out my new ball hahaha :P

hehe just now went tampines sportslink to buy tis bball for $49... the cheapest i can find in the shop already... n ok lah not bad... no haf to buy too expensive just to play rite hahaha :P wah but on the way to tampines it started to rain beri heavily sia... y sunday rain... i rather 2moro then rain whole day... then i would feel relax even when working hahaha :P

by the time i came home already abt 5pm... mum already abt to finish cooking dinner liaoz... actually thgt of going down to try out the new bball... but the floor wet loh... maybe next week then go down play... just now tried to pump somemore air into the ball... but every time i insert the pin, alot of air will start to escape... at 1st it scared me tat the new ball already got fault, cannot pump air... but then realised tat it was just my pin, noticed it was abit rusty n there was a tiny gap where the air keep on escaping from... so no choice loh... went back down to get a new pump... tis time i got a foot pump... easier to use compared to the hand pump i had hahaha :P

cant wait for next week to try out the bball hahaha...

time wont let anyone forget the past, nor the sorrows... one could only hide it deep within... n hope the pain will nv surface again... but it would never be possible... cus even if one manage to forget, someday somehow sometingy would just remind one abt tat someone...

was tinking the other day, if the person u love doesn't love in return... in future if u were to see tis person with another guy, in a relationship... how would u feel?

happy for her?... maybe, but i know i would be lying to myself... most probably i would just break down... just by tinking abt tis would already make me wanna cry...

just another day of tinking too much...

so sian... at home notingy to do... ps2 oso play till sian liaoz cus no new games :P... go out oso dont know go where... somemore will perspire alot so rather not go out... but stay home can do wat sia... tv oso sometimes so borin... hai~

just now read another person's blog... wat was written in it really made me tink... am i living for myself or for my parents or for the person i love... well, the last one is definitely out of the question already, cus i cant find the heart to love anyone anymore... so, wat i'm doing now is probably living for my parents, if not then i might have already ended my life... different ppl have different tinking n ways to live their lifes, if everyone tinks the same n do tingys the same then life would never have been so complicated rite?

but then again, y must life be so complicated? so tat we could learn? make mistakes n try pick ourselves up n carry on? so wat would we gain in the end? experience? memories? but wat can we do with them? share it with others? who would wanna bother with u when their own life's already in a mess? so tat those would did badly in life could feel more miserable when they see ppl who were able to carry on n be successful after every stumble?

hai~ life... sometimes u love it sometimes u loathe it...

i'm getting fat again liaoz... hahahahaha